So what can I say, not blogged for over a month. All I can say is that I am crap at blogging. I have wanted to blog, but I don't think you would really enjoy my catalogue of complaints, and the black dog that has been hanging around me - and I don't mean Millie!
What is it about this time of year that makes me feel so depressed? I love Christmas, the decorations, the music, the food, the contentment of being with my family, and I know that this year part of this mood is the fact that I have no house to call my own, I can't put my wonderful 8' tree up in my lovely lounge, or the sitting room or the 30' conservatory. I miss arranging all my elves and santas on the mantlepiece. I miss setting the table with elegant candles and beautiful china. But, this is all completely rubbish, its all material things that I have managed without before and can manage without again.
What I really miss is not having a child in the house. I have noticed before as Dan got older, that Christmas was just not as enjoyable as having a bouncy, excited boy waiting for Christmas Day. When Dan's dad and I divorced, we decided that we would take it in turns having him for Christmas, and oh boy when he was younger and when he was away, it was awful!
These days however there are no gluey, glittery ornaments turning up from school, no nativity plays, where I cry my eyes out trying not to let anyone see. No silly Christmas songs to learn. Just thinking about it, is making me cry - mind you I have been known to cry at adverts on the telly, so that's not saying much, but I am sure you know what I mean.
Plus this week has been a bad one. On Tuesday I did something so incredibly stupid I am surprised you didn't hear me kicking and screaming in frustration. I ordered 2 books from Amazon, something which I haven't done for about a year, I remembered to change my address on my account and ordered these books with the One Click thingy. On Wednesday morning I opened an email from Amazon telling me that the invoice would be sent to my address in Sheffield, and the books would be sent to the house we lived in 2 years ago in Biggleswade Bedfordshire. Apparently, although I changed my address, there is another address to change under One Click. HO HUM!
There is nobody living in that house now and knowing my luck the post man will probably have left it on the doorstep. Amazon were helpful but couldn't do anything about it, you cannot cancel an order once you have One Clicked it. I can't tell you how cross I was with myself.
Also this week Dan broke a very large bauble with its own stand, that I had bought, so that we could have some sort of decoration.
This week we have been to the Memory Service with my mum, she has been having real trouble remembering things, words just seem to fail her sometimes right in the middle of a sentance. She had a CT scan a few weeks ago and today we found out the results. Her brain is fine for a 90 year old, but she is only a couple of points away from having dementia. So things are going to get worse.
And finally, the finance company have remembered that we still have a car and they want it back. So as from Monday we will have no car. Oh what joy! Could it happen at a worse time of year?
So there you have it 2 weeks to Christmas and the black dog is circling round.
Sorry for a really whingy post, and especially one with no pictures. Thank you to Mandi from Vintage kitten asking if i was ok as I had not posted, that was really kind of you to care.
Hopefully the next post will tell you that I have won the lottery or something!
Keep well
Rosie